Apr 7, 2011

Tradecraft: Piloxing Teen Witch Gets a Passport

So Proctor & Gamble, that consumer goods behemoth that makes everything from Old Spice to Bounty to Duracel to Tampax, encompassing brands as disparate as Pringles and Dolce & Gabbana, also dabbles in movies.  Family-friendly television movies.  They've aired three so far on NBC as time buys, meaning that the company pays for a whole two-hour chunk of advertising time, but mixes in some original programming amidst the commercials.  These movies are all envisioned as backdoor pilots, meaning that they could potentially spawn their own series, but so far none of them have.  It was only a matter of time before P&G got around to the spy genre, and sure enough, they're plunging in now with Passport starring Robyn Lively.  Despite a consistent career including guest stints on shows as high-profile as JAG30 Rock, The X-Files and Psych, many people probably still remember Lively best from her title role in the 1989 cult classic Teen Witch, or her part in Twin Peaks. Not me. To me, she'll always be proto-Nancy Drew Nancy Stratemeyer, Indiana Jones' high school sweetheart on The Young Indiana Jones Chroincles. But now she's Piloxing amateur spy Meredith... oh, I better start at the beginning.

This is one of those loglines that simply beggars belief—especially considering that the date on this Deadline article is April 1. I'm gonna guess it's for real, though, because Deadline doesn't seem like the sort of site to go in for April Fooling. According to the trade blog (presumably quoting an official synopsis), "Passport stars Robyn Lively as Meredith, an expert chef skilled in Piloxing (Pilates mixed with boxing) who is raising her teen kids alone because of her geologist husband Simon's (Loren Dean) erratic travel schedule. When Simon doesn't return home from his latest trip, Michelle [surely they mean Meredith?] launches an investigation and discovers that he has been leading a double-life as a covert intelligence operative with CAD (Clandestine Activities Division). Along [with?] her teenage daughter (Skyler Day), she travels to Europe to save Simon, who was abducted during his latest mission and must work together with his captor to bring down a traitor at CAD." Sounds sort of like Meet Jane meets Missing with... Piloxing?  And a dab of Salt for good measure? (The pilot script for Missing, by the way, is awesome, and I probably do it a disservice by mentioning anywhere near a nonsense word that's partially made out exercise trend.) Oh, who am I kidding? I'll give it a watch...

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