DVD Review: Fantastic Argoman (1967)

DVD Review: Fantastic Argoman (1967)

Argoman is a superhero very much of the Sixties Euro variety. Clearly, Argoman never had an Uncle Ben who died and taught him any lessons about great power and great responsibility. Argoman is gifted with great powers, but he uses them primarily to make his enemies kill each other and to force beautiful women to come to his island and have sex with him! (Exactly what most Eurospy heroes would do were they imbued with superpowers.) And when he uses them for good, he charges people (and governments) for his services! Examples of fees include Peter the Great’s snuff box (which he recognizes on sight), the Mona Lisa and other priceless treasures, all of which he uses to decorate his own impossibly mod pad.

Argoman’s powers allow him to make people do his bidding via psychic suggestion and to levitate objects (up to a certain size). His weakness (recounted in unapologetically blatant expositional conversation with his turban-wearing Indian manservant, Chandra–who looks a tad like Boris Karlof in The Wild Wild West) is that he loses his powers for six hours following any "rendezvous with a woman." And, being a Swinging Sixties sort of bachelor, Argoman likes rendevousing with women!

Argoman is, in reality, pipe-smoking playboy Sir Reginald Hoover (Eurospy star Roger Browne), a man of science and practitioner of PK, or psychokinesis. (Very trendy for 1967.) He’s seen by Scotland Yard (personified by the perpetually flustered Inspector Lawrence) as a "feather-brained fop," yet called on for his advice on any major crime. Lawrence explains to his constable assistant (who has a very strange cockney accent) that Sir Reginald was brought up in America, and therefore "lacks a British sense of duty." (And a British accent.)

As Argoman, Sir Reginald wears a rather silly (and, frankly, quite unflattering) getup of yellow and black spandex with a red cape, a black ski mask and red Geordi La Forge glasses. When he uses his psychic powers, his eyes glow from within the glasses. (It’s possible this image is inspired by Cyclops in the X-Men comics published by Marvel.) Without the ability to fly or swing from webs, Argoman is prone to leaping, prancing and flouncing about in his costume. And he runs like a girl. It’s quite a sight. I’m not quite sure why Browne decided to wave his arms about whilst running, but perhaps he felt it the only natural thing to do when one is wearing tights. Or perhaps he thought it looked more heroic. Whatever the reason, it reminded me of Misty Mundae as Spiderbabe in the low budget Skinimax parody of Spider-man. (Come on, you know you’ve seen it!) Like Miss Mundae, Browne certainly displays an unbridled enthusiasm for running around in such a manner.

Batman may be a caped crusader who masquerades as a wealthy playboy to protect his alter ego, but Argoman is the opposite. He is a wealthy playboy (and an unapologetic one at that!) who enjoys being a wealthy playboy and who dons a mask and costume for a lark. He spends the better part of the first half of the movie in his Sir Reginald persona rather than his Argoman one. As Sir Reginald, Browne is indistinguishable from any other cad of a Eurospy hero. Bored, he selects a woman from his virtual "little black book" (it’s a video screen!) and invites her over to his private island. But then he gets tired of waiting, so he goes out to the beach and uses his super-vision to scan for a nearer chick. He sees a beautiful woman (Secret Agent Fireball’s Dominique Boschero) out for a ride in her hovercraft (a frequent sight in the Sixties, no doubt) and psychically commands her to "come to the beach." After reeling her in like a fish, he challenges her to a fixed game involving bows and arrows. If she wins, she "gets to leave!" (And she gets a Rolls Royce and some emeralds.) If he wins... he pushes a button and a door opens revealing a swinging bed. (And I don’t mean "swinging" in the typical Sixties sense–although that does apply; I mean it in the very literal sense in that it is suspended from the ceiling by four cables. That's the way Argoman rolls.)

Meanwhile, the Crown Jewels have been stolen. Inspector Lawrence assures the Home Secretary that they’ll get another crown in time for the next coronation, and immediately suspects Argoman of the crime. Not that unfairly, really, because stealing the Crown Jewels does seem to be the sort of thing Argoman would get up to. Before Argoman can be arrested, however, the crown is suddenly returned with a note signed by Jenabelle, the Queen of the World. (Yes, that’s how she signs her notes.) The theft was merely a demonstration of her power. Now she wants the mysterious "Mordof R4" (or Marduf R4 or Morudof R4 or Mordoof R4 depending on who’s pronouncing it) in exchange for... something. For not doing something worse, I guess. What, exactly, the Mordof R4 is is anyone’s guess, though we’re treated to one of those great Eurospy demonstrations of power in which it is apparently shown to have the ability to turn a Franc coin chewy. Who knew?

Even a note from the Queen of the World herself isn’t quite enough to convince Inspector Lawrence of Argoman’s innocence in the Crown Jewels affair; he briefly mulls the idea that Argoman and Jenabelle are one and the same. (Now that would be an interesting twist!) Even while suspecting Argoman, Lawrence turns to his alter ego (oh, the irony!) for advice. When Sir Reginald is sent on a mission meant for a Scotland Yard man or "man of action" (something Inspector Lawrence can’t comprehend this layabout being), he’s instructed to make himself recognizable by wearing a black bowler with a tweed checked suit. Mindful of this foppish aristocrat’s safety, the police ask if there’s anything he objects to. He says yes: "having to wear a tweed suit with a black bowler hat!" He might wear a yellow jumpsuit that makes him look like he’s got a paunch as Argoman, but as Sir Reginald he’s just as much of a sartorial snob as any of his better off secret agent counterparts.

Anyway, Sir Reginald is captured and the self-proclaimed Queen of the World, who turns out to be none other than the beautiful woman he picked up on her hovercraft earlier! If only he’d bothered to ask for her name amidst their lovemaking, he might have realized that there probably aren’t too many Jenabelles in the phonebook... or the world. Oh well. She quickly deduces his secret identity, so he tears off his checked suit revealing his Argoman costume underneath. Easier to operate that way, I suppose.

Jenabelle is quite the dedicated follower of fashion herself. She wears a different outfit in every scene of the movie, each one more outlandish than the last. She’s also prone to wearing rather ridiculous hats! (My favorite one looks like a potted plant sitting on her head.)

Argoman’s clearly had enough of her and her hats, so he naturally refuses when she makes the inevitable offer for him to join her as her consort. Prepared for this rejection, Jenabelle reveals that she’s captured his other girlfriend, Samantha. (The one he called and got tired of waiting for.) She reveals a video screen showing Samantha being tormented by a monstrous robot. It’s not quite clear what the metal brute is doing to her, but Jenabelle assures us that "it’s not a pleasant fate to suffer at the hands of a robot." Best of all, she pronounces it "RO-but," like Dr. Zoidberg on Futurama.

"Your instincts are diabolic!" snarls Argoman.

Jenabelle leaves Argoman in a fiendish trap and goes off to talk to her giant ray. I’m not really sure what variety of ray it is, but I’ll assume that its purpose is destructive, and it probably depends on the Marduf to operate. Whatever the case, Jenabelle loves her ray machine. "You alone make it possible that I accomplish all I dreamt I would do," she coos to it, stroking its metal plating. "You, with your mysterious absorption of cosmic light. We’ll produce... what no ruler in the world has ever had! As many loyal automatons to manipulate as I please. I’m ready to proceed!" So that’s what it does! (I guess.)

"Start the ray compressor!" commands a henchman.

Argoman does get to perform some everyday superheroics while on the track of the Marduf, like saving a runaway train by flouncing atop it and using his psychic powers to change a switch. Detracting just a little from the derring-do, Argoman always looks vaguely confused when flouncing about in his costume.

By the time he catches up to Jenabelle, she’s dressed like some sort of Techno-Medusa in a silver lame tunic and matching headgear with metallic snaky bits protruding from it. She’s also got a three-barreled pistol that looks like something Samuel L. Jackson would wield in The Spirit.

Will Argoman manage to save the world, and defeat its ill-meaning Queen? I won’t say, but you can probably guess. Once all the dust has settled, Argoman’s at least cleared of all wrongdoing, but immediately steals a government motorcycle, claiming it as his prize. Is he a hero or is he a criminal? "Half and half," decides Inspector Lawrence, as he orders his men to give chase. It’s a very apropos conclusion on the Inspector’s part. All European costumed adventurers from the Sixties appear to be half and half, and that’s what makes them interesting. (I suppose the same could be said for all the deeply flawed Eurospy heroes, ostensibly on the side of good but always being total jerks about it.) A general rule of thumb in case you come across a masked man while traversing Europe in the Sixties: if he’s wearing bright yellow or red spandex–or any sort of cape–then the hero half probably prevails. If he’s dressed all in black, however, or looks remotely like Diabolik, then he’s probably slightly more criminal than hero.

Fantastic Argoman is a deliriously entertaining movie, powered by game performances, an enthusiastic effects department and a terrific score by the great Piero Umiliani. The Region 1 DVD, courtesy of a company called Substance, is probably marginal in its legality and definitely marginal in its print quality. Despite the scratchiness of the print and the iffyness of the transfer, however, it does appear to be anamorphic... though you may have to alter the settings on your player to achieve the correct aspect ratio. On regular TVs, it will show up as slightly letterboxed and somewhat squished. Who cares. The movie is so much fun that I’m just glad to have it at all. And there's good news for fans: Dorado Films (every bit as fantastic as the Fantastic Argoman himself) plans to release a legitimate, widescreen version later this spring! (But they need some help with it.) Based on their Eurospy titles, I'm betting this will be much higher quality, so hold out for this one. I can't wait!

CONTEST REMINDER: Last Day To Enter To Win A&E's Cult Spy Collection!

Last chance to win one of the best prizes ever given away here on the Double O Section! If you haven't already entered to win A&E's Spy Collection megaset (more details here), make sure you do so by midnight PST tonight! Click here to enter. (It's easy.) This set is the ideal introduction to the wonderful world of ITC spy/adventure series from the Sixties and early Seventies. You'll get quite a taste of The Champions, The Protectors, The Persuaders! and The Prisoner on this 14-disc collection comprising nearly forty hours of quality spy entertainment. I'm holding it in my hand right now, and it's one hefty chunk of DVD goodness, packed in a sturdy gatefold package made to look like a top secret file. The winner will be announced tomorrow. Good luck!

Costumed Adventurer Week

Welcome to Costumed Adventurer Week on the Double O Section! I know, I know. “Costumed Adventurers?” you’re thinking (if I may be so bold as to presume). “What do superheroes have to do with spies?” You’re thinking you hit the wrong blog. However, in the Sixties there was a pretty close relationship between superheroes and spies. In 1966, James Bond and Batman were about the biggest things going in American pop culture. As all things popular did, that seeped into Italian pop culture, and specifically Italian knock-off culture. The Italians, you’ll recall, made a cottage industry out of cranking out budget imitations of whatever was big in Hollywood. Thus, the Eurospy genre and the Italian superhero genre (based on Italian comic books known as fumetti) were closely related. So closely, in fact, that were it not for the skintight costumes themselves, it would be hard to tell the difference between their spies and their superheroes. Masks brought no nobility to Italian heroes like Argoman or Flashman. They behaved just as badly as their secret agent counterparts–and were often played by the same actors. (Note the two different posters for The Fantastic Argoman–one marketing it as a fumetti and the other as a spy/caper picture retitled How to Steal the Crown of England.)

Italian superheroes of the time tended to be more antiheroes than superheroes, in fact... which in some ways makes them a bit more interesting than the American variety. They almost always operated outside the law, and often thought nothing of committing a little thievery on the side of their superheroics. I suspect that this anti-establishment tendency of Italian superheroes had more than a little to do with the country’s recent memory of life under Fascism. The very concept of masked vigilantes has the smack of Fascism about it, in fact–something Alan Moore famously plays up in his seminal superhero opus Watchmen. Italian audiences who still harbored memories of Mussolini didn't want government-endorsed supermen; they were more likely to identify with anti-establishment characters in their comics and movies.

Diabolik, of course, is the quintessential Italian costumed adventurer. And he was no hero at all; he was motivated by greed and ambition... and the thrill of the hunt. “Out for all he can take, caress or get away with,” blared the American movie posters for Mario Bava’s film version of Diabolik. Other Italian heroes often shared those ambitions, even if their motivations were more outright heroic. Argoman, for example, puts on tights to fight crime, promote world peace and save the world... but he’s not above claiming trophies for his services from the governments he aids. No, these guys aren’t exactly heroes. The best term for them is “costumed adventurers,” a term Moore uses in his graphic novel. Whether their aim is to uphold the law or tear it down, the reason they put on tights is to pursue adventure. In honor of the very faithful, rather fantastic movie version of Watchmen hitting theaters this week, I thought it was a good time to examine that curious subgenre of the Eurospy phenomenon: spies who wear tights! Check back each day over the coming week for a different example.



Yeah, I know, I know... Weeks usually start on Sunday or Monday. What’s this one doing starting on a Wednesday? Well, my last-minute trip to WonderCon this past weekend (and an exciting evening at the Watchmen premiere Monday night) delayed me a bit on getting my planned posts up. But I wanted to go ahead and do it this week anyway, no matter what day I started on. So this particular week starts on a Wednesday!

Upcoming Spy DVDs: Baron And Burn

The Baron's Features Revealed!

Looks like my speculation that it would be bare-bones was wrong. Next week's previously announced Region 1 release of The Baron from Koch Media will have some great bonus features after all! Unlike A&E's Saint or Prisoner DVDs, and unlike Image's Jason King, Koch's The Baron will include all the audio commentaries and audio introductions featured on Umbrella's excellent Australian release! (In a rare occurence, both versions beat out Network's UK release, which has some features but includes no commentaries.) That means American fans will get to hear Sue Lloyd and Production Supervisor Johnny Goodman talk about the pilot episode, "Diplomatic Immunity," Peter Wyngarde introduce "The Legions of Ammak," Sue Lloyd and prolific ITC director Cyril Frankel commentate on "Something for a Rainy Day," Brian Clemens introduce "The Maze," Annette Andre introduce "Roundabout," and Lloyd, Goodman and director Roy Ward Baker discussing "The Man Outside." That's a healthy batch of bonus features--and a real surprise for American fans who are used to featureless Region 1 releases of these series. Koch also does a good job describing the series:

Tall, handsome and debonair, John Mannering (Steve Forrest), aka THE BARON, is an international art and antiques dealer working with British Intelligence tracking stolen treasures. In a world of danger, greed and intrigue, THE BARON, aided by the glamorous Cordelia Winfield (Sue Lloyd), must risk his life on espionage missions to recover priceless works of art and bring criminals to justice.

Koch's 8-disc set of The Baron comes in an attractive, heavily illustrated gatefold package. I'll have a full review up sometime in the next week or so...

More Burn Notice Soon

TVShowsOnDVD is reporting a June 16 release for Fox's Burn Notice: Season 2, although this has yet to be confirmed by the studio. It sounds right, though, as that's roughly the same timeframe in which we got Season 1 and would be in time for a mid to late summer start for Season 3 on USA. According to the site, it will be a 4-disc set with all sixteen episodes of the two part season, plus bonus material. Specific information on the features isn't available, but the website speculates that they will roughly mirror the generous features on Season 1, including select commentaries, gag reels and possibly deleted scenes. I selected the first season of Burn Notice on DVD as my favorite spy TV DVD of last year.

New Spy DVDs Out This Week: Say U.N.C.L.E.!

Today is the day that the man from U.N.C.L.E. returns... in the 1983 CBS TV movie The Return of the Man From U.N.C.L.E.: The 15 Years Later Affair! And it's not just Napoleon Solo and Iyla Kuryakin returning. Notable former spies Patrick Macnee and George Lazenby also show up, with Macnee stepping in as Sir John Raleigh, a replacement for U.N.C.L.E. boss Mr. Waverly (owing to Leo G. Carroll's death in 1972) and Lazenby as a tuxedoed, Aston Martin-driving secret agent identified only as "JB". (Who could that be?) The TV movie, directed by Avengers stalwart Ray Austin, is naturally presented in its original fullscreen aspect ration, and the only extra is a trailer. Of course, U.N.C.L.E. fans don't need any extras for this disc to be a must-own. It's a requisite supplement to the fantastic box set Time-Life released of the series. Now all we need is the Sixties theatrical movies in Region 1, as they do differ slightly from the episodes from which they're cobbled...

Double O Section At Wondercon This Weekend

I'll be at WonderCon in San Francisco this weekend. If any readers are attending, please feel free to stop by the Studio 407 booth and ask for Matt. I should be there a big chunk of Saturday and Sunday promoting my comic book, Night & Fog. The rest of the time I'll be probably be scouring the floor for spy stuff, or haunting Mike Mignola's table...

Cheap Spy DVDs On DeepDiscount

DeepDiscount is having a limited-time sale offering tons of movies for just $5 (heavy on MGM titles). Some that might interest spy fans include Crossplot, Billion Dollar Brain, Company Business, Get Smart's Bruce and Lloyd Out of Control, The High Commissioner, Classic CIA/KGB Movies, The Holcroft Covenent, Inspector Clouseau, Curse of the Pink Panther, Mata Hari, Operation Amsterdam, The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes, The Quiet American, The Road to Hong Kong, Son of the Pink Panther, Taffin, and xXx. Act quickly, though, if you see a title you like, as the website says that titles are subject to change depending on stock and the whole sale is for an extremely limited time. Just throughout today, some titles in the $3 section have changed.

CONTEST: Win A&E's Cult Spy Collection!

This is the ultimate prize for Double O Section readers: a fourteen-disc collection comprising such fantastic ITC spy shows as The Persuaders!, The Protectors, The Prisoner and The Champions... all in one set! All you have to do to win a copy of A&E's luxurious new Spy Collection megaset (more details here) is send an email with the subject heading "SPY COLLECTION" including your name and mailing address to the Double O Section by midnight, Pacific Time on Thursday, March 5, 2009. Winners will be announced in one week's time, next Friday. This is the ideal introduction to all of these great series, as it includes A&E's first set of each of them. (For all but The Prisoner, that comprises half the series.) The Spy Collection is a great way to discover which ones you like (which will probably be all of them!) and then delve deeper later by picking up the second set. Good luck!

One entry per person, please. Double entries will be disqualified. One winner will be drawn at random and announced on Friday, March 6, 2009. The winner's name will be posted here and they will be notified via email. All entries will be deleted immediately after the contest’s close, and no personal information will be retained or transmitted to any third parties. The contest is open to anyone, in any country, although this DVD set is NTSC Region 1, so make sure that you have a compatible player. Unfortunately, the Double O Section cannot assume responsibility for items lost or damaged in transit.

Tradecraft: Marvel Announces Potential S.H.I.E.L.D. Movie

After a salary disagreement almost led to him not reprising his Iron Man role as Nick Fury, Samuel L. Jackson and Marvel Studios have kissed and made up. The Hollywood Reporter reveals that the sixty-year-old actor has just signed a deal to play the comic book superspy in nine more movies. That's right, a nine picture deal. As far as I know, such a thing is unprecedented. I'm reminded of Harrison Ford's answer when a reporter asked him at the press junket for Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom if it was true he was committed to play the archaeologist in six films. "Not me," he quipped. "They must be talking to Roger Moore." But even Sir Roger never played James Bond nine times! Of course, many of those movies (including Iron Man 2, Thor, The Avengers [Marvel's version, mind you; no relation to Steed and Mrs. Peel] and Captain America: The First Avenger) might amount to just cameos. But the most interesting revelation in the trade is that "also on the table is the possibility of toplining a S.H.I.E.L.D. movie, which is in development." Hm. So the long-gestating Nick Fury movie has apparently morphed into a S.H.I.E.L.D. movie, presumably because they've now got a star attached too old to topline his own adventure. (Remember, such a movie would still be years away.) In the comics, ol' Nick keeps young by chugging something called Infinity Serum, but I don't think Mr. Jackson has any of that. It does seem a little bit insane to sign a sixty-year-old actor to a nine picture deal! The Hollywood Reporter's Risky Business blog (which offers further commentary on the deal) puts the eventual S.H.I.E.L.D. movie "sometime around the start of the first Sasha Obama administration."

Over the years, potential Nick Fury, Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. movies have been set up at various studios, including Lionsgate and Paramount. Scripts have been written, but come to nothing. The closest thing to date is a 1998 Fox TV movie written by David Goyer and starring David Hasselhoff as the eyepatched agent. Jackson's Fury is based on the character as presented in Marvel's "Ultimate" line, which should be easy for the actor as Ultimate Nick Fury is based on Jackson!

DVD Review: Fury In Marrakesh (Furia A Marrakech) (1966)

For a movie with Marrakesh in the title, I was expecting a lot of deserts and North African rooftops and marketplaces. But while the film does offer those sights, it also offers so many more: tropical beaches, Times Square neon, and snowy Alpine vistas. Fury In Marrakesh takes us to hot spy locations all around the world, and lets us soak up the atmosphere. It’s actually one of the best spy movies I can think of in terms of sheer variety in exciting settings. It’s also one of the most fun Eurospy films I’ve seen, delivering almost everything you could want from the genre: impressive chases, good fights, cool gadgets (loads of ‘em, in fact!), beautiful women (though, surprisingly, not a main one) and, of course, the aforementioned locales. Top that all off with one of the strangest, jaw-droppingly mind boggling endings of any Eurospy flick, and it’s easy to recommend Fury In Marrakesh–highly. In fact, provided they’re not put off by the inexplicable oddness of the ending, this would be a great introduction to the genre for James Bond fans looking to broaden their spy horizons. Maybe the next step into Eurospy waters from the slightly more sure footing of Deadlier Than the Male.

Supposedly Fury In Marrakesh is the third in the "Bob Fleming" series that began with Secret Agent Fireball, but it’s so hard to actually delineate Eurospy series since the movies and their characters had so many different names in the various countries they were released in. (Based on the popularity of the three genuine "077" movies starring Ken Clark, that number was ascribed to just about every Eurospy hero in one country or another at various times!) The marketing campaigns for Fury In Marrakesh showcased in the poster gallery on Fin de Siecle’s new Region 2 DVD call the movie by many different names (Death Pays In Dollars is a good one) and identify the hero as, variously, Bob Fleming, Joe Fleming and Bob Dixon, among others. On the English language dub included on this disc, Bob Dixon is the name they go with. But the movie is from the pen of Ernesto Gastaldi, writer of the two previous Bob Fleming movies, and directed by the team responsible for the first one as well, so it’s reasonable to assume that it is meant to be a Bob Fleming adventure. If it is, though, then it’s a Casino Royale-like reboot of the brief series–and only a year after it began! Fleming is now played by the younger, lither Stephen Forsyth, stepping into Richard Harrison’s shoes. And when we meet him, he’s still in spy school. Fury In Marrakesh is the story of his first mission. (His boss even worries it’s "too complex a mission " to send so green an agent!) And Forsyth (coming off as sort of a cross between George Lazenby and John Phillip Law) is better suited to playing a neophyte agent than the more world-weary Harrison. So is this a carefully constructed and deliberately recast prequel revealing all the complex motivations that drive Fleming in his subsequent adventures, explaining how he became such an arrogant chauvinist? Actually, it kind of works along those lines–but, no, clearly not. No Eurospy adventure was ever that thought through. It seems clear that it’s supposed to be a different character entirely, so I’ll call him by the name he’s given in this print: Bob Dixon.

For what it ultimately becomes, Fury In Marrakesh opens quite inauspiciously, with a girl drugging a man and then robbing his safe... which is hidden inside an awfully fake-looking television set. (What happens if someone wants to watch TV?) After this action-free, single-setting pre-title sequence that clearly has nothing on James Bond, we’re into the credits and the zippy theme music. Then the SPECTRE-like villainous organization assembles, and their perpetually sunglasses-wearing leader addresses them, dramatically revealing, "My real name is Karl Kuntz!" with a louder, obviously different voice than the rest of the dub. What could be the reason for that? Judging from the non-removable Swedish subtitles, the Swedes think he's called Charlie Clark. His objective? To spread Nazi counterfeit dollars and pounds ("Hitler's treasure," found in a hidden vault), flooding the market, making him and his men rich and ruining the American economy! (And presumably the British one as well, though he doesn’t mention it.) But there’s a problem. Someone in his own organization has already stolen some of the counterfeit money. The girl from the opening! She’s called Monique on the English track and Dora on the Italian one and in the Swedish subtitles, and she’s played by Dominique Boschero (Secret Agent Fireball, Fantastic Argoman).

The action moves to New York City, represented in 1965 by the World’s Fair... a place apparently teeming with spies! An American official says that Monique " was spotted by one of our agents at the Fair." One of them! Apparently, it was seen as a wise allocation of government funds to deploy lots of agents to the World’s Fair! I guess it was cheaper than really sending them to all those countries... and, hey, it paid off! Hearing that intel, the suited American officials determine, "We’re going to need the most discrete agent the CIA can assign to this mission." Cue Bob Dixon.

We meet Dixon in the Caribbean. He’s retrieving a "formula" of some sort from a beautiful bartender with piercing blue eyes–and he's anything but discrete. Two baddies are after him, so he makes his getaway on a motor scooter as they pursue by car across road and field and dirt alleyways between shanties. Some shanties even get destroyed in the chase, although probably not enough to make Michael Bay happy. The chase goes onto the beach where Dixon manages to lose the pursuing car in the surf as it submerges where his scooter traveled easily.

Unfortunately, he then gets caught on a motorbike level tripwire in some trees. How on earth, you ask, did his enemies know to plan an ambush in that particular copse, where he had randomly fled to? Because it’s all just a training course! And he didn’t complete it quickly enough to impress his instructors. "No one could do it that fast," Dixon protests, "not even Batman!" (Or, in the Swedish version, "not even James Bond!")
But that’s it for training, because Bob’s needed elsewhere. He’s off to New York, where Monique is luckily still hanging around the World’s Fair. He trails her from there into the city–specifically Times Square at its neon, sleazy peak. (Which is a cool location to see.) There, he mountaineers around fire escapes above a neon sign for "BOND Clothes." It’s hard to believe this location material was filmed legally! But the idea of stolen shots only makes the setting more authentic. Peering into her hotel from a fire escape, Dixon sees that Monique’s former employers have caught up to her–including the beautiful Greta (Cristina Gajoni in a fantastically Sixties blond wig). Dixon ends up on the losing end of the ensuing fight, and they whisk his only lead back to Marrakesh.

Before giving chase, Dixon stops by Q Branch for equipment. Well, it’s not actually Q Branch, of course, but it’s a Q Branch-like area designated with giant neon sign that reads: "DANGER Technologycal Equipment." What follows is not only the best scene in the movie, but the best imitation Q scene ever! Really, it could almost be dropped into an actual Bond movie–except that it goes on longer than any of 007's visits with Q ever do. Dixon’s Q is called Sergeant Lester. Dixon greets him, "Hey Sargent! Reporting for equipment! Bob Dixon, special agent."

To which the droll Lester, perched up on a balcony, replies, "You’re all special, Mr. Dixon. I’m coming." Then he proceeds to jump down from the second-storey balcony, his fall arrested by a big orange balloon that "inflates" out of his back! What an entrance!

The balloon's hard to top, but all of Lester’s gadgets are pretty neat. He’s got a pen that shoots around corners. (Supposedly it "senses body heat and goes smashing into it," but the dummy he demonstrates with doesn’t appear to generate any body heat. Oh well.) There’s also a pocket flame-thrower that doesn’t work because he forgot to put a flint in it, a shoe that contains a bomb, and "radio capsules for your teeth" that transmit Morse Code! (And also contain cyanide.) We’re even treated to one of the better variations I’ve seen on the classic, sleazy Eurospy (and eventually Bond, in one of his less-inspired moments) gag of looking at girls through X-ray glasses. (And the glasses in question look like a giant cheese grater for some reason.)

"Oh Eileen!" calls Lester to one of his comely assistants. "Come into the lab for a minute, will you?" Eileen dutifully does as she’s asked, only to find Dixon with the X-ray specs. She gives a squeal and hides behind a pillar–presumably lead.

"Sargent Lester!" she rebukes her employer sternly, "I’m getting pretty tired of you and your electronic Peeping Tom!"

Undaunted, the inventor reminds her that "female personnel are expected to cooperate in scientific experiments."

"I didn’t expect to be working for people with X-ray eyes!" she retorts, before exclaiming, "Men!" and retreated in an exasperated huff.

"All I get are complaints!" sighs the Q imitator. Nothing like a bit of Sixties-style workplace sexual harassment to enliven a Eurospy movie!

So that’s just the first thirty minutes. Armed with the requisite gadgets, it’s off to the titular Marrakesh for all the deserts, street bazaars (complete with performing monkeys) and, of course, belly dancers that you would expect–as well as more chases, more explosions, more gadgets... and even someone falling for the old poison cigarette trick. Oh, and poor Monique gets tied up in a skimpy dress and tortured with electrical shocks to reveal what she did with the rest of the money.

In Marrakesh, Dixon meets his own local contact, a Kerim Bey-type CIA station chief who "loves life" and who has adopted the local customs and taken four wives. He doesn’t want Bob to bring violence or bodies to his city. He likes his cover life as a stamp collector too much. Therefore, of course, we know that he’s doomed. He also meets his British contact, "Alex Keene, Special Branch." (Keene first sneaks in on him while he’s in the shower, so that’s a bit awkward. ) When Dixon seems a little more preoccupied with ogling the local ladies (or "examining the merchandise," as he puts it), Keene questions his commitment. "You came here on a vacation? Or a mission?"

This gives Dixon the opportunity to typify the Eurospy hero’s attitude: "Getting away from that drill sergeant and coming abroad with an unlimited expense account is a vacation!" he tells Keene, adding, "What a wonderful spot this is! Sure was lucky to get to come to Marrakesh on my first mission." That’s what it’s really about, isn’t it? Traveling to exotic locations, ogling exquisite women and occasionally taking a bullet for the privilege. One particularly exquisite woman who would be happy to provide the bullet is Greta, who Dixon finally meets formally after watching her rather unenthusiastic strip routine. (She moonlights at nightclubs for ostensible networking purposes. Seriously, that's what she claims.) When she responds a little too eagerly to his brash seduction attempts (he claims to be a poet–a first for a Eurospy, I think), Keene cautions him with the obvious admonition that it may be a trap. "So?" asks Dixon. "What if it is? With that kind of bait, I’ll take the hook!" (I’m inclined to agree with him on that one.)

It is a trap, of course, with thrilling consequences that lead to another shift in scenery, this time to the beautiful Alps–where the bunker containing "Hitler’s treasure" of counterfeit bills is supposedly hidden. Bob Dixon flies in on a plane with skis, parks it atop a mountain, and promptly bumps into another beautiful woman (Mitsouko) in the middle of snowy nowhere! Abandoning his plane, he gladly accepts a ride down the slope on the back of her skis. "Follow every movement I make," she instructs him, to which he suavely replies, "Nothing could turn me away from you except centrifugal force!"

The finale takes place atop, above and inside the Matterhorn–and the production doesn’t skimp on the hardware! We get a thrilling Licence To Kill-like prop plane/helicopter chase, complete with Dixon clinging to a strut of the prop over the snowy peaks. We also get some sort of mean-looking large snow vehicle on treads, and machine guns sticking out of each of the vehicles. On a more personal scale, we’re also treated to betrayals, Mission: Impossible-like mask effects and vague explanations of things that happen along the lines of, "This emits an electron stream. Heart attack." Also, many of the aforementioned vehicles explode. It’s quite a spectacular, large-scale ending for a Eurospy movie, and further evidence that Fury In Marrakesh has to be one of the bigger budget entries in the cycle.

Now, I could wrap up the review right here by saying, "What are you waiting for? Go buy this DVD already! It’s terrific!" All that is true, but I simply cannot sign off without discussing the film’s fascinatingly bizarre coda. On the one hand, I hate to spoil an ending, but on the other it’s simply too weird not to discuss. And if there are people out there who still need further convincing that this movie is a must-see, the sheer oddness of it might put them over the edge. So I’ll put out a mild spoiler warning right here. If you’re already sold and definitely going to see it, then you might want to be surprised and stop reading now. But the ending is so strange that it may not really be capable of being spoiled anyway, so don’t run away too quickly.

In the typical Bondian fashion, Dixon finds himself victorious (no, that’s not the spoiler; you knew that already!) atop the mountain alone with the girl, Mitsouko (I'm not sure her character is ever named)–who has come to his rescue with guns blazing. It’s clear that she’s not just a local girl who likes to ski as she first presented herself. She must be an agent. Bob decides to call her on this as they ski down the slope, this time with him doing the skiing and her riding behind. "You’re one of our lady agents, aren’t you?" asks Bob, proud of his deduction.

"Yes," she says, "only that’s not quite all of it. I’m not really one of your lady agents. I’m..."–as she tears off her wig–"one of your... fellow agents." It’s still Mitsouko, but with short hair, now playing a man. "Will Takamura, at your service." Bob is (rather understandably, I suppose) horrified at the deception. "A man?" he practically shrieks, "Nooooo!" And he falls off his skis and rolls down the mountain in shock. The End. Or, "Fine," as they say in Italian.

Wow! What an ending. Bob doesn’t end up with any girl! There isn’t even a girl! (Bear in mind, too, that there is no reason given in the script why a male agent would have to dress in drag for that assignment!) It’s... just... so... weird! What could have prompted Gastaldi, Martino and Loy to end their picture this way? Why would Mitsouko agree to it? It seems almost as if someone suggested the joke on the last day of filming, and they all shrugged their shoulders and said, "Sure! Let’s film it!" Whatever the real cause, I’m choosing to believe that is what happened, because it just seems so in keeping with the fun "let’s put on a show!" attitude of Eurospy cinema. But whatever the reason, the ending is so utterly bizarre and out of left field that it made me go from loving the movie to considering it one of my very favorite Eurospy entries ever. It’s exactly that sort of "what the hell?" moment that I love about the genre, that you would never (thankfully!) find in the mainstream spy pictures like James Bond.

From beginning to end, Fury In Marrakesh is incredibly fun, top-notch entertainment. And as I mentioned at the beginning, it would make a great choice as an entry-level Eurospy movie for Bond fans ready to broaden their spy horizons. Let’s call it "Gateway Eurospy."

Fin de Siecle’s Region 2 PAL DVD is another fantastic transfer, as I expected based on their impressive freshman Eurospy effort, Secret Agent Fireball. There were one or two jumps in the forty-year-old print, but they can’t be blamed for that. Overall, this widescreen disc looks as good as you can dream of for a Sixties Eurospy movie. Once again (as I already mentioned), there’s an extensive poster and still gallery included as a bonus feature. If you’re a fan of the genre, or just looking to get into it, Furia A Marrakech is a must-purchase DVD!

Furia A Marrakech is available from Fin de Siecle's website for 129 kronar (just $14.40), and from DiabolikDVD in America for $24.95.

Upcoming Spy DVDs: Lightning Bolt

The excellent cult movie blog DVD Sleuth reports that Antonio Margheriti’s ridiculously fun 1966 Eurospy movie Lightning Bolt (aka Operation Goldman) will be released on DVD from Media Blasters as part of their next "Rare Flix" triple feature set. This is great news, as it's one of the better Eurospy entries and a movie that deserves a wider audience! The only downside is that it probably won't be widescreen, as previous "Rare Flix" releases have been in fullscreen only. Furthermore, the distributors don't seem to have much respect for the film. Their press release calls it "a spaghetti-spy film full of enough bad James Bond rip-offs to inspire a drinking game--and hilarious dubbing to match." So it seems doubtful that they'd put too much effort into remastering it or anything. But at least they're putting it out! For that, I'm grateful. The other movies included on the triple feature will be a Fred Williamson martial arts flick called Transformed and some sort of psychedelic grindhouse movie called Boogievision. I'm sure they're all well worth having! The disc hits stores April 24. Head over to DVD Sleuth to see the artwork.

Read my full review of Lightning Bolt here.

New Spy DVDs Out This Week: A&E Sampler

This week brings the perfect box set for American spy enthusiasts looking to dip their feet into the vast pool of ITC adventure series, eager to expand their cult TV horizons beyond The Avengers and The Saint. A&E's The Spy Collection Megaset features the first sets (of two total each) of The Protectors, starring the man from U.N.C.L.E. himself, Robert Vaughn, and The Persuaders!, starring Tony Curtis and an immediately pre-Bond Roger Moore, along with half of The Champions (the cult show about secret agents with superpowers that’s currently being remade for the big screen with a script by Guillermo Del Toro)–which is all that A&E has released of that show to date, unfortunately. In addition to all that, you also get a taste of the ultimate cult spy series, The Prisoner with the first two discs of the renowned Patrick McGoohan vehicle (amounting to just three episodes). The whole bundle is a tad pricey... but much cheaper than what the individual volumes of these series originally retailed for. It's really the ideal sampler for discovering the wonderful world of ITC series. And if you like what you see of The Prisoner or The Persuaders! (which you will) or The Protectors (which you might), you can still go out and buy the rest separately. If you like what you see of The Champions (which you will), well then you're kind of out of luck (at least until the movie gets made) because that's all that's available from A&E so far. But at least you'll have it all! If you've already got these, then obviously there's no reason to get this set. But if you don't... then, trust me, this the coolest release imaginable, and a must-have!

While that's the only major spy release out this week, as long as I'm talking about new discs I'm compelled to also point out that my favorite Dario Argento movie, the ultra-rare, previously near impossible to see Four Flies on Grey Velvet makes its American DVD debut today! There's nothing spy about it, but if you're into gialli, make sure you pick this one up. You won't regret it!

Tradecraft: Plame And Salt

Watts and Penn Play the Plame Game

Doug Liman has switched Antipodean actresses in his Valerie Plame movie: According to Variety, Naomi Watts and not Nicole Kidman (as previously reported) will be starring as outed CIA agent Valerie Plame in The Bourne Identity director's movie based on her story, Fair Game. (Wasn't that the title of a disposable Cindy Crawford action movie in the 90s?)Furthermore, newly-anointed Best Actor Sean Penn is in talks to come aboard as Plame's husband, Ambassador Joseph Wilson. The trade reminds us: "Wilson watched his wife's CIA status become compromised after he wrote op-ed columns that accused the Bush Administration of manipulating intelligence about weapons of mass destruction to justify the invasion of Iraq."

Penn is an excellent actor (who completely disappeared into the character of Harvey Milk in a wonderful performance... even though I was rooting for Mickey Rourke), but he is so instantly associated with his very public political stances that his casting instantly politicizes the film, which I think is too bad. By its very nature, the story instantly became a divisive political one, when at its heart its the stuff of classic spy fiction: an agent in the field is betrayed and compromised by her masters for reasons of petty bureaucracy that have nothing to do with her directly. John Le Carré could have made it up. But it's real, and it's a fascinating tale of a wronged spook, and I hope that Penn's casting doesn't alienate a potential segment of the audience for what should be a top-notch real-life spy movie. Then again, as I said to begin with, he's a fantastic actor and an Oscar winner, so hopefully none of that will matter. His presence probably does more good for the film than harm.

Chiwetel Joins Salt

First-rate British actor Chiwetel Ejiofor is the latest to come aboard the Angelina Jolie (formerly Tom Cruise) spy thriller Salt, directed by Patriot Games' and The Quiet American's Phillip Noyce. He will play the Gerard to her Kimble, the Javert to her Jean Valjean. (Or, more appropriately, I suppose, The Operative to her Mal.) Variety puts it less obliquely: "Ejiofor will play Peabody, a young CIA agent who works for Winter (Liev Schreiber), the mentor of Evelyn Salt (Jolie), an agent fingered as a Russian sleeper spy. With Peabody in hot pursuit, she must clear her name and figure out the identity of the real spy." I think I know that identity...

Champions Soundtrack Coming From Network

As I mentioned briefly in my article about their upcoming DVD set of Espionage, UK distributor Network continues their superb releases of soundtracks to classic Sixties ITC series in March with The Champions! The three-disc set includes original music by Prisoner and Danger Man veterans like Robert Farnon, Edwin Astley, Albert Elms and Tony Hatch. The Champions was a 1968 series in the Avengers mold about a trio of secret agents imbued with superpowers by an Eastern mystic when their plane crash-landed in the Himalayas. Okay, so it's very 1968, but it's a pretty awesome show. It starred Stuart Damon, William Gaunt and the drop-dead gorgeous Alexandra Bastedo (Casino Royale '67). Half of the episodes are available on Region 1 DVD from A&E in the United States; all of them are available in a features-laden Region 2 set from Network in the United Kingdom. As has been widely covered here, there is a movie remake in development originated by Guillermo Del Toro. Tom Cruise is tentatively attached to star. Should that movie go forward, I have assurances from A&E that they would release the rest of the episodes.

Network's soundtrack set (and this series had some great music) will be available in March as a web exclusive. There's no listing for it yet on their site, but look for it soon! I also have it on good authority that we can look forward to some more oft-requested ITC soundtracks from Network before the year's out (think halos)... and that I may even get my frequently-stated wish in the form of a Persuaders! set!

Spying On The Oscars - Live

I hadn't planned on live-blogging the Oscars, but there have already been a couple of spy moments, so I guess I might as well... just mentioning the spy-related stuff. Everyone's live-blogging, but I doubt anyone else is taking that approach! Keep refreshing.

Saw Daniel Craig lurking in the background on the red carpet, so he'll probably be a presenter...

I loved the inclusion of Eva Green as Vesper Lynde at the end of that montage of accountant clips introducing the Price-Waterhouse guys (or wherever they're from this year).

There was just a TV spot for the Nicolas Cage movie Knowing. Hasn't he already made this movie like six times before? It's kind of like a "Best of Nicholas Cage" movie: part National Treasure, part Next, part everything else...

Hugh Jackman looks good in a tux. I think he could have been Bond in another reality.

It's good to see Eva Marie Saint, who still looks good 50 years after North By Northwest, but not good enough to justify not showing clips of the nominated performances! What's up with that? If the whole night is going to be past winners describing scenes from the nominated movies instead of actually showing them, then we're in for a really long night... I hate that.

Here's Daniel! Looking very Bondian in his tuxedo. Presenting the Oscar for Art Direction with Sarah Jessica Parker. The one category that Quantum of Solace really should have been nominated for! Still, a lot of good candidates.

They're also presenting costume design. And make-up! The Academy's getting a lot of mileage out of 007 and Carrie Bradshaw. "We don't have to tell you what a make-up artist does," says Sarah.

"Just look at us," deadpans Daniel. I love hearing James Bond talk about Hellboy! (Hellboy II is nominated for make-up. Too bad it didn't win.)

There's some Pierce Brosnan in the romance montage, from Mama Mia. I wonder if he's there? I wish they'd had Brosnan and Craig present together. That would have been cool! And Michael Caine could have united them, the way he did with Roger Moore and Sean Connery when the three buddies appeared as co-presenters back in the Eighties...

Seth Rogan and James Franco (in their stoner characters from Pineapple Express) mentioned Bond in their hilarious short film about comedies that weren't nominated. They're getting stoned and watching bootlegs, including Mama Mia. "It stars James Bond and that chick from Doubt," says Rogan. Then Spielberg's go-to cinematographer Janusz Kaminski shows up in their apartment and things get really hilarious. This is so weird! And awesome. Then the three of them take the stage together. What an odd combination!

Lots of Bond clips in the action montage, along with Indy and even Transporter 3! Really, who thought we'd be seeing Tranporter 3 in an Academy Awards show? Cool! I actually found the clips from the opening car chase in Quantum of Solace easier to follow here, in this quick-cut clip montage, than they were in the actual movie! Now that says something. And that was all leading into the Visual Effects Oscar, presented by Will Smith. 007's special effects coordinator Chris Corbould is nominated for The Dark Knight... but he doesn't win.

I love Alias's Michael Giacchino, who's serving as the musical director for tonight's awards show, but I miss hearing the themes of the winning films accompanying the winners to the stage!

Liam Neeson is presenting Best Foreign Film and starts off by speaking French. Is that sort of an apology for tearing up Paris and urging Americans never to go there in Taken? They introduced him as "Academy Award Nominee," so I guess that means he's never won an Oscar. That's weird!

Time for the memorial reel... Lots of spy stars here, sadly... BUT THEY'RE NOT SHOWING THEM! What the hell? There's Quiller Memorandum writer Harold Pinter... and Paul Newman, of course (where's that DVD of The Prize Warner promised two years ago?)... but where's John Phillip Law??? Where's Patrick McGoohan? Yes, he died this year, but Ricardo Monteblan died the same day and they showed him! And, yes, he's better known for TV, but he did plenty of movies! Seriously, what the hell? That's an outrage. Not only that, but the whole thing was handled unbelievably badly. Queen Latifah did fine and "I'll Be Seeing You" (which would have been so appropriate for McGoohan!) was a good choice of song, but they should have just shown the tribute reel on screen, not her performing. It was nearly impossible to read some of the names on a TV screen! That's really offensive. What's normally a really moving part of the ceremony was just annoying instead. It's a huge failure on the part of this year's producers all around. Frankly, I'm disgusted. This puts a cloud over the whole broadcast.

Sophia Loren always looks great, even 40+ years after her spy role in Arabesque. And she's always classy. But I still don't like this past-winner-talking-about-the-nominated-performance thing instead of showing clips of the performances!

It's tough to end the show with soundless clips of next year's movies. Montages like this work well for movies we've already seen and know from the previous years, but it's a tough way to promote upcoming ones. That said, those brief glimpses of Sherlock Holmes looked pretty to me! But... are there no big spy movies coming out this year? I guess not, really. Unless you count State of Play. That's surprising, what with everything that's in development for the next year!

Well... that's it. No Pierce Brosnan. Not even Judi Dench amidst all those previous winners. (There was Halle Berry, though.) Not as much spy stuff as I thought there might be. As for the show? Well, I admire the desire to do something different, but this wasn't it. Hugh Jackman was OK, and I did like how they demonstrated the screenwriting, but the whole show was pretty poor. They definitely need to bring back clips of the actors next year, and they need to do the memorial reel right!